3 Things to Hold on to When Support is Nowhere to Be Found

3 Things to Hold on to When Support is Nowhere to be Found.png

You've finally strategized a plan to get your health on track. You've spent hours researching what changes you'll make to your food and in your routine to include time to exercise, meditate, or sleep more. You're eager and rared up to go! Nothing can stop you now.

Only. . . something does stop you. Rather, someone

Your significant other, your best friend, or closest family member. The person you were MOST counting on for support (and secretly hoping they would join you!).

They don't understand why you want to make these changes.

Not only will they not get on board with you (which always makes lifestyle changes easier when you have a partner in crime) but they're doing the exact opposite of supporting you.

They're sabotaging you just by being who they are and doing what they have always done.



Here are 3 ways to ensure your success with your health and lifestyle plan


1. Realize That YOU Have the Power and It's Not Fair to Place Blame on Them

Understand that you are powerful. You truly DO have control over your life. . . even if it doesn't feel like it at times. You have the power of choice!

When it comes to food, you have 100% control over what goes in your mouth. No one is holding you down force feeding you (at least I hope not!). This choice is yours. 

So even when your partner is unsupportive, even when they taunt you with sweet treats and pasta, even when they express how dissatisfied they are with your new lifestyle. . . realize it's not fair to blame them for your choices. 

While it's fair to say they're not being helpful and supportive, which is what you need from them, they're also not force feeding you.

Take back your power. Understand you have full control over what goes in your mouth. You have full control over the choice to schedule in your workouts. You have full control over yourself and your actions despite how they might make you feel.


2. Find a Different Avenue to Accountability

Those that have support and accountability while making lifestyle changes are much more likely to follow through and reach their goals. 

The good news is that it doesn't matter what type of support. Maybe it's a health coach, fitness trainer, or friend.

I particularly like supportive Facebook groups where folks gather who have similar goals and ways of thinking. There are a ton of them out there. Find one that resonates with you. 

It's not just about getting support, but giving support encourages us to do better ourselves. 

Check in with them daily. You're more likely to want to do well on your plan when you have someone to share it with, especially if they are doing it with you.


3. Keep a Journal and Especially Keep Track of Your Positive Emotions!

As a coach, nothing gives me eye rolls more than this suggestion, lol! People sometimes think of it as tedious and pointless. But journaling is such a powerful tool when you use it right. 

You don't need to write down every little thing you ate or every detail of your activity- unless that's your thing and it helps you find success.

Here are my simple suggestions for effective journaling:

- Food- write down the best meal you ate and/or the worst meal you ate. More importantly, make some notes about how you felt - physically, mentally, and emotionally- when you ate these things.

Were you proud of yourself? Were you surprised by anything? Were you overly full? Were you still hungry? What emotions came up?

- Activity- whether it's a 20 minute walk or an in home work out video, record it down in your journal. This gives you a sense of accomplishment and gives you positive feelings that encourage you to repeat that behavior. Journal on how good and how empowered you feel after doing it!

- Remind yourself daily of your 'why.' If you missed my blog post on this find it here: How Connecting With Your 'Why' Will Help You to Finally Reach Your Goals. A deep connection to why you're after these goals in the first place will keep you committed and in it for the long haul.

- Challenges- Write down what challenges you face and free write on why you think a particular challenge arose. Or, notice patterns and why certain challenges continue to arise for you. Always be sure to include the emotions surrounding these feelings and circumstances.

- ***The Good!***- More importantly than writing down your challenges is free writing on any and all of the positive emotions and experiences you encounter as you go through this journey.

These are the most important because it's these positive emotions of gratitude, success, and confidence that will carry you through to the end.  


Even without the support of your partner, best friend, or family member, implement these 3 things and you will no doubt be on your way!


To your health and healing,



Mandi Palmer is a Certified Health Coach who has been inspiring and leading others in their pursuit of wellness since 2008. Her well-rounded approach to helping others acheive wellness includes nutrition, healthy-never-over-doing-it movment, building purpose and reslience to stress, the ancient art of qigong, comfortably cleansing, and using the published works of Anthony William, The Medical Medium.

<Disclaimer> This information is to be used for educational purposes only and is not to be used to diagnose, treat, or cure disease. The author of this article is not a doctor, licensed dietitian, or licensed nutritionist. By reading this article, you are agreeing to take responsibility for your own health and decisions regarding food and you waive the right to hold Mandi Palmer responsible for any negative instance or result that may occur after engaging with this information.